Busting the Top 5 Myths about Counseling and Therapy in San Francisco, California

 If you’ve read some of my earlier blog posts and done some research online, you’re getting a sense of what therapy in San Francisco, California might be like and how to find a therapist for yourself. However, you still have some questions, doubts or fears. For a long time, there has been much stigma about therapy and what it means to go to therapy. You might hear things from friends or maybe you’ve watched shows or seen movies where the character goes to therapy and you’re wondering if it’s really like what they portray. Scenes in the media often have dramatic or comedic tone for entertainment purposes and is hardly the truth. I want to continue to make therapy a more transparent process, so I’m busting the top 5 myths about psychotherapy.

Myth #1: It’s the therapist’s job to cure a person’s mental health problems.

A therapist is someone that is trained to provide treatment for a variety of mental health issues. Therapists do this through different approaches and methods of psychotherapy. While a person or client may go to a therapist for help with mental health problems, the therapist and client work together to improve symptoms of mental illness and emotional distress. Therapists help people to understand and cope with their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors which help to reduce symptoms of depression, anxiety, and stress, and improve self esteem and overall well-being. It’s often not enough just to go to a therapist. Having willingness and motivation to engage in the process is what helps lead to improvement and a positive outcome.

Myth #2: Talking to a therapist is like talking to a friend.

While many people prefer to speak to a trusted friend about things going on in their life, the truth is sometimes we need a neutral third party to speak with, someone who is not in our personal or professional life. A therapy relationship is quite different than a friendship because a therapist will allow you to focus completely on yourself and on your issues while maintaining a neutral position, supporting you whatever you decide. And because a therapist has training, they can help you figure things out and give you tools to feel better. During sessions, a therapist does not share personal information about themselves, so you, as a client, have the freedom and space to get what you need as you and your therapist work together to focus on you to resolve your problems.  

Myth #3: Your therapist will tell you what to do.

I often get questions from clients asking me, “Doctor, what do you think I should do?” However, the truth is, it’s very rare that I tell people what I think they should do. It's usually only out of concern for their safety or wellbeing. But really, my job is to help you figure out what is the right decision for you and what you need to do for yourself. So instead of answering questions about what I think you should do, I ask questions to help dig a little bit deeper to understand a little bit more about the dilemma you’re facing so that you can come to the decision that’s right for you. I help you recognize prior decisions and what those outcomes were like for you and help you brainstorm your options. This is to help empower you as an individual and I think that is a better kind of help that you can get rather than having a therapist simply tell you what to do.

Myth #4: You will feel good after every therapy session.

While most of us therapists would like their clients to feel good after every session, good therapy means that sometimes you're delving into deeper issues and you might actually feel worse. In therapy, we take time and give attention to issues that are causing distress that we might otherwise ignore or suppress. If you came to therapy to address certain issues, spending time focusing on them might cause you to feel worse at first. However, this is just part of the process and is the equivalent of trying to heal something that hasn't been healed yet. But as a therapist, my goal is not for my client to feel bad needlessly, but to experience these emotions as part of the deeper work that is done to heal those wounds, to feel better overall, and to move forward beyond those issues. Oh, and sometimes, yes, you actually will feel better after a therapy session.

Myth #5: A therapist or psychologist can prescribe you medication.

This is a good topic to address because there are different types of mental health providers and trying to understand what they each do can be very confusing. Therapists (this includes licensed counselors, marriage and family therapists, clinical social workers, and psychotherapists) cannot prescribe medication and as it currently stands, psychologists in most states, including California, cannot prescribe medications. Psychiatrists are medical doctors who went to medical school and understand mental health issues. They are able to prescribe medication for mental health issues. While therapists and psychologists do not prescribe medication, we do have some knowledge about medication and can have a conversation with you about whether or not medication could be helpful. They can also refer you to a prescriber where you would have a proper medication consultation and possibly get medication. Therapists and psychologists, without prescribing medication, have training in various methods of healing and can help you solve problems in non-medicinal ways.

Hopefully, busting these myths with truths helps give you a more realistic and honest idea about therapy. If you have any other questions, contact me here for a free 15-minute phone consultation. I’ll do my best to answer your questions, explore working together or help you find someone who is right for you.  

My specialties include depression, anxiety, work stress, family distress, and life transitions.