FAQ’s about Therapy with a Psychologist in San Francisco, California

So you’ve looked for a few therapists, you’ve even spoken to a few of them and had some of your questions answered. What’s next? You still have some unanswered questions or confusion as to what happens next and what to expect in therapy. Therapy can feel quite confusing and mysterious. Sometimes this causes even more anxiety that people don’t want to start therapy for the fear of the unknown. As a psychologist, I believe in what I do and the enormous benefits of good therapy with the right therapist and I don’t believe it should be mystery. I want to help answer some of those questions you might still have to demystify this thing called therapy.

Therapy doesn’t have to be a mystery

It’s a good thing to have questions about coming to therapy. These are a few common questions I hear people wanting to ask and some answers.

• I don’t know really know what my goals are for therapy. Do I need to figure this out before starting?

No. Whatever is compelling you to begin therapy, you want to share this with the therapist you are considering working with. This might be a good place to start and part of therapy is working together to help identify what those goals might be. Also, some goals can naturally surface through the therapy process, and you might realize what needs your attention. In some forms of psychotherapy, such as psychoanalysis, there is no focus on goals, and the purpose is more about self-awareness through free association.

• Will I be in therapy long-term? What if I just want to focus on 1-2 things and be done with therapy in a few months?

In most cases, this is up to you, and a discussion with your therapist about what might be best for you. Sometimes, you might just want to focus on a couple of things at that moment in your life. In which case, once you feel resolved with that issue, you might feel ready to stop therapy. You can always return to therapy later on to address other issues, when the time is right for you, and many people do this. Some people, for various reasons, choose to be in ongoing therapy. The benefits of this is ongoing support through ups and downs of life, which often bring up things that can be focused on in therapy, and being able to work on deeper issues. For example, relationship patterns that you might want to break because these patterns can repeat in our lives and often take time to change in big ways.

• What if I feel therapy isn’t helping me enough?

This is an important question, and you should feel comfortable to bring this up to your therapist. While it takes time to reap the benefits of therapy, if after a while you still don’t feel you’re benefitting, you might need a change. If you bring this up with your therapist, there’s a chance your therapist has other ideas, and you can try something different that might be more helpful. If you feel it’s because you and the therapist are not a good fit, you may want to find someone else. It’s ok to talk to your therapist about these feelings, we are professionals and know that you need to feel comfortable speaking with someone trained in your specific issue. Your therapist can provide some referrals to someone who might be a better fit.

• What if through the course of therapy, I want to focus on some other issues?

Go ahead! It’s your therapy and you can focus on anything you like! Feel comfortable to bring this up anytime. Your therapist should be open to focusing on whatever you bring up and will talk with you about the advantages and disadvantages of changing topics versus continuing to focus on the topics you were already discussing to not avoid important issues. But really, you get to decide.

• Do I have to lie on the couch?

This is a question that refers more to in person therapy, and not so much to online therapy. Traditional psychotherapy such as psychoanalysis included laying on the coach and speaking freely. However, this is not as common these days, unless you’re in psychoanalysis, a specific form of therapy. In most other forms of therapy, both you and the therapist are sitting and speaking like you would normally with anyone else. If in your therapy you are doing some meditation, mindfulness exercise, hypnotherapy or somatic (body) therapy, you might sit or lay down, and its usually whatever is comfortable to you.

• Is online therapy not as helpful or effective as in person therapy?

There are advantages to both doing therapy in person or online. I will go into depth on this in a separate blog post. But when it comes to which is more effective, there have been several research studies comparing in person therapy and online therapy and results found that treatment outcomes and client satisfaction were equally the same. This means that whether you do therapy in person or online, you are likely to benefit just the same. While you might have a personal preference for one or the other, we found that during the pandemic, when only online therapy was available and we didn’t’ have a choice, many people entering therapy made progress and felt better.

These are a few of the most frequently asked questions (FAQ’s) about therapy and I do hope it answered some of your questions. If you have any other questions, feel free to contact me here for a free 15-minute phone consultation. I’ll be happy to answer your questions, see if we work together or direct you to someone else.  

My specialties include depression, anxiety, work stress, family distress, and life transitions.